Riddles 1, 2 and 3

RIDDLE

from what we cannot hold the stars are made
—W.S. Merwin

When I saw the forest
it was late afternoon.

The sky held the color
of something
almost forgotten.
I pulled off the road—
found a gravel path
sloping toward the trees.

It had to be the light
that remembered
my last Saturday at Y camp:
freshly husked corn
roasting on the cob
and all the nervous cicadas
calming down for dark.

Because I didn’t know
the handle could be hot
I burned myself
pulling a skillet from the fire
and was cursing quietly
when a blonde boy
I hadn’t met
told me to put my fingers
in his milk. It’s okay,
he said, won’t hurt as much.

I was 12, stuck on the step
between childhood and puberty
just starting to understand
that I liked being alone
and trying the riddle
of how to be a person
who might turn
into an “adult.”

At the time, I did not
have these words
but on this drive
I’d been wondering
about what I’ve become
and how I live in this country.

It all came back:
the red and white carton
with a bent straw in it
my fingers starting to blister
then the white kid’s
shy shrug of a smile.

In the forest
it was already night

 

RIDDLE 2

It was already evening
after six: August—

the sun, bright as anger
drove me to look for shade

and there was a mountain
not too far away:

it would be cooler there
with so many trees

and the sleepy animals
settling in the shadows—

someone said there was
a clear pond partway up

where you could splash your face
and suddenly see why

things are the way they are
so I walked and I wondered

what such knowing might do:
would I stop being afraid

of what could happen and
what might happen after that?

Would I stop asking questions
about systems, gnashing my teeth

on the ideas that have built
this world, this kind of world—

and the walk had gotten long
but I was getting there, though now

the sun was gone, taking with it
the burnt-orange hem of the sky

and with the risen dark
the mountain disappeared

 

RIDDLE 3

So, I kissed her and
as with all good kisses
the sense of a story
before the story—
the seed before it is
undone by water.

There is something like
this  between two mouths
that first time: a brightness
opens your eyes, late
morning sun rushing
the window: you can’t

tell where you are.
Then, the room
comes back to focus
and the neighborhood
which is still familiar
but somehow more
like the first taste
of a flavor that will
become your favorite.

I had known such a place
before  as had she
with someone else: the thirst
the same, the same half-
question that cannot
be asked exactly

though you hear it
the way you almost
hear your heart walking
in your chest

or the way some days
you find a song in your mouth
that you’d forgotten
for a really long time

 

 



Click here to read Tim Seibles on the origin of the poems.

Image: Photo by Anshu A on Unsplash, licensed under CC 2.0.

Tim Seibles on the poems:
“Riddle”

On a long drive, I passed a large, wooded area and found myself thinking about my camp days as an adolescent. The focal point of this poem is a moment that had been lost in my head for years and years. Inexplicably, it came back very sharply. As always, the writing began tentatively; it’s hard to know if you’ve got something or if you’re simply chasing shadows. The greatest challenge came in measuring my twelve-year-old sensibility against my present adult mind. Deciding which details to keep and which to let go was also difficult, but it’s mostly a pleasure to allow yourself to be swept up in the cinema of memory.
——-

“Riddle 2”

This poem was conceived in South Africa, a country still suffering the terrible inequities that defined the now defunct apartheid system. For some reason, I often found myself staring at Table Mountain, which stood miles away on the other side of Cape Town. After several attempts to write about it, a sort of myth emerged. I chose couplets because I wanted the feel of a step-by-step unfolding. I often find myself wanting a way out of the chronic anxieties that punctuate this life. This poem began as an answer to that wish.
——-

“Riddle 3”

I called these poems riddles because each one states or implies a question that cannot be answered really. In this one, I’m considering what happens exactly in a first kiss. How does the intimate history of each person define how a love will or will not develop? The most difficult work in making this poem was searching for a way to convey the idea that kissing is always more than physical. Because we are still taught to associate sexuality with naughtiness, I find it especially worthwhile to challenge such thoughts by writing about the physical and mystical aspects of the erotic life.

Tim Seibles
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